{"id":1097,"date":"2015-04-11T18:40:26","date_gmt":"2015-04-11T16:40:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/?p=1097"},"modified":"2015-04-11T18:40:26","modified_gmt":"2015-04-11T16:40:26","slug":"zanganele-xxxiii","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/?p=1097","title":{"rendered":"Z\u0103ng\u0103nele (XXXIII)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Z\u0103ng\u0103nele<\/h1>\n

XXXIII.<\/h1>\n

Jurnal de patimi<\/h1>\n

\"zanganele\"

S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na asta m-am min\u021bit c\u0103 nu voi pregeta s\u0103-mi sacrific toate puterile pe altarul crezului muzical \u0219i c\u0103 voi mai scoate din ad\u00e2ncurile c\u0103ilor mele auditive o p\u0103rticic\u0103, fie c\u00e2t de mic\u0103, cu scorneli cantabile. M-am min\u021bit c\u0103 sunt cineva \u0219i v-am \u00een\u0219elat \u0219i pe voi.<\/p>\n

\nP\u0103c\u0103tosul din mine n-ar fi \u00een stare s\u0103 calce prag de biseric\u0103, dar s\u0103rutai crucea \u0219i primii ploaia de pic\u0103turi de busuioc acas\u0103, cam tocit s\u0103rmanul de at\u00e2ta \u00eenmiresmare de enoria\u0219i cu numele, fiindc\u0103 eu cu anafora \u0219i s\u00e2ngele lui Iisus nu mai avem treab\u0103 demult. Pesmetul l-am uitat \u00een armat\u0103, vini\u0219orul st\u0103 doar de bibelou \u00een vitrin\u0103. A f\u0103cut 20 de ani.<\/p>\n

\nRecunosc a suta oar\u0103 c\u0103 nu pot fi \u00een r\u00e2nd cu oamenii. Nu-mi st\u0103 \u00een fire s\u0103 fur, ba chiar am meteahna de a fi corect p\u00e2n\u0103 la ultima le\u021bcaie. C\u00e2t m-am str\u0103duit n-am putut r\u0103zbate dincolo de grani\u021ba muncitorului.<\/p>\n

\nM\u0103rturisesc c\u0103 m-a\u0219 putea st\u0103p\u00e2ni \u00een fa\u021ba incorectitudinii, dar firea mea coleric\u0103 d\u0103 fr\u00e2u imediat puhoaielor de cuvinte, nu totdeauna potrivite, nu totdeauna conforme cu vocabularul \u0219i cu adev\u0103rat vulgare. Am \u00eenjurat niscai p\u0103rin\u021bi \u0219i de mam\u0103 \u0219i de tat\u0103, neglijen\u021bi cu odraslele.<\/p>\n

\nAp\u0103r\u0103 Doamne ochiul adulter \u0219i trimite ar\u0219i\u021ba sufletului preacurvit \u00een h\u0103urile Gheenei \u0219i \u00eentoarce-\u021bi chipul c\u0103tre robul t\u0103u nedemn. Pe mine m-a ferit.<\/p>\n

\nAlung\u0103 din mine patima furiei, a \u00eencord\u00e2rii de nerv \u0219i \u00eensenineaz\u0103 chipul \u00eencruntat \u00een fa\u021ba sup\u0103r\u0103rii. Vindec\u0103 sufletul r\u0103nit.<\/p>\n

\nAm g\u00e2nduri negre c\u00e2nd \u00eenchid ochii \u0219i nu pot defel adormi. Ur\u00e2te, neomene\u0219ti.<\/p>\n

\nSunt lene\u0219. Las lucrurile de pe o zi pe alta \u0219i s-au cam \u00eendesit \u00een ultima perioad\u0103.<\/p>\n

\nAm observat, de mai demult, c\u0103 sunt \u0219i prost. Adic\u0103 nu de\u0219tept. Descop\u0103r pe m\u0103sur\u0103 ce timpul meu se scurge \u00eencet c\u0103 lipsurile mele intelectuale sunt vaste. Probabil c\u0103 aici are dreptate \u0219i so\u021bia. Degeaba ai trei sinapse de acela\u0219i fel \u0219i miliarde de conexiuni, sunt mai pu\u021bine dec\u00e2t cinci cu func\u021bii diferite. Aici trebuie s\u0103 fiu de acord cu ea.<\/p>\n

\nAm \u00eenceput s\u0103 nu-i mai suport u\u0219or pe cei din jurul meu. S\u0103 fie din cauz\u0103 c\u0103 m-am trezit \u00een prag de final de tinere\u021be c\u0103 nu \u0219tiu mai nimic despre via\u021b\u0103, despre mersul ei, bizar pentru mine, despre legile \u0219i cutumele tuturor?<\/p>\n

\nN-a c\u00e2ntat coco\u0219ul m\u0103car o dat\u0103 \u0219i eu m-am dezis de R\u0103duleasca \u0219i Nane, de Freddy \u0219i George, de…. Gomora m\u0103-sii! M-am dezis de to\u021bi libertinii, democri\u021bii, partidacii, procuratorii, jurispruden\u021bele, organigramele \u0219i legifer\u0103rile.<\/p>\n

\nAlung\u0103 himera societ\u0103\u021bii perfecte, e ochiul naibii. Las\u0103-m\u0103 cu creierii limpezi, ca lacrima, f\u0103-m\u0103 Doamne cel dint\u00e2i t\u0103nt\u0103l\u0103u, \u0103l din coad\u0103 om. A\u0219a n-ar mai cuteza ispita s\u0103-mi dea t\u00e2rcoale \u0219i s\u0103 v\u0103d toate str\u00e2mb\u0103turile lumii.<\/p>\n

\nMi-am f\u0103cut portret \u0219i \u00een fiecare zi privesc eu spre mine ca la nimeni altul. Z\u0103u c\u0103-mi vine s\u0103-mi dau like, c\u0103 frumos m-a mai f\u0103cut mama. P\u0103i dac\u0103 eu nu \u021bin la mine, la altul cum? Mi-a spus mie cineva, om cu fric\u0103 de tine Doamne, c\u0103 \u00eent\u00e2i s\u0103 m\u0103 rog de s\u0103n\u0103tatea mea \u0219i dup\u0103 aceea pentru ceilal\u021bi. Eu, neini\u021biatul \u00een tainele Tale, fac taman pe dos. Prima oar\u0103 \u00eei iau pe to\u021bi ai mei la urat \u0219i dac\u0103 mai r\u0103m\u00e2ne \u0219i pentru mine un dram de bun\u0103tate mi-o \u00eempart, dar de cele mai multe ori uit. A\u0219a-i c-am gre\u0219it?<\/p>\n

\nNici la capitolul lu\u0103rii de via\u021ba nu stau deloc bine. Am c\u0103lcat o furnic\u0103, am strivit de perete un p\u0103ianjen \u0219i am executat o musc\u0103 \u00een stil chis\u0103li\u021b\u0103. M\u0103 pot a\u0219eza a\u0219adar \u00eentre criminali, nu \u00eentre \u0103ia mari, n-am eu haz s\u0103 tai pensii, s\u0103 iau ajutorul celor cu dizabilit\u0103\u021bi, nici \u0219ofer nu sunt ca s\u0103 fac de petrecanie vreunui biet participant nevinovat la trafic.
\nAm c\u0103lcat toate cele zece porunci \u00een s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na mare. Cu g\u00e2ndul. M\u0103 iart\u0103….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Z\u0103ng\u0103nele XXXIII. Jurnal de patimi S\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na asta m-am min\u021bit c\u0103 nu voi pregeta s\u0103-mi sacrific toate puterile pe altarul crezului<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":1098,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"colormag_page_container_layout":"default_layout","colormag_page_sidebar_layout":"default_layout","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"video_url":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1,97],"tags":[68,139,48],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1097"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1097"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1097\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1099,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1097\/revisions\/1099"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1098"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1097"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1097"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1097"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}