{"id":10635,"date":"2020-09-13T01:35:11","date_gmt":"2020-09-12T22:35:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/?p=10635"},"modified":"2020-09-13T01:35:11","modified_gmt":"2020-09-12T22:35:11","slug":"literadura-nr-17-6","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/?p=10635","title":{"rendered":"Literadura nr. 17 (6)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Florentina Loredana DALIAN<\/strong><\/p>\n

Scrisori netrimise (2)<\/strong><\/p>\n

Aveam s\u0103 aflu cur\u00e2nd c\u0103 Nae nu
\nterminase surprizele. \u00cen drum spre
\nTortona, ne-am oprit la Verona parc\u0103,
\nunde avea de l\u0103sat ni\u015fte colete altor rom\u00e2ni
\npleca\u0163i la munc\u0103. Am \u00eenghi\u0163it-o \u015fi pe asta,
\noricum n-a\u015f fi avut \u00eencotro. Am cobor\u00e2t din
\nma\u015fin\u0103 la insisten\u0163ele lui Nae, nu \u00eenainte \u00eens\u0103
\nde a asista la un mic conflict. \u00cen\u0163elesesem c\u0103
\nacolo era o fabric\u0103 de prelucrare a pielii, unde
\nlucrau foarte mul\u0163i rom\u00e2ni. Nici nu oprise
\nbine Nae ma\u015fina, c\u0103 patronul italian se \u015fi
\n\u00eenfiin\u0163ase la geam, s\u0103 vad\u0103 ce \u201emarf\u0103\u201d i-a
\nadus. Nu de lucr\u0103tori avea nevoie. Nae \u00eei face
\nsemn spre Ligia; patronul, o ar\u0103tare cu m\u00e2ini
\n\u015fi picioare scurte, nemul\u0163umit, d\u0103 din cap a
\nnega\u0163ie. \u00ce\u015fi rote\u015fte ochii prin ma\u015fin\u0103 \u015fi,
\np\u0103r\u00e2nd c\u0103 g\u0103sise ce c\u0103uta, arat\u0103 spre mine.
\nNae protesteaz\u0103 \u2013 No, no! \u2013 d\u00e2ndu-i c\u00e2teva
\nexplica\u0163ii \u00eentr-o italian\u0103 de balt\u0103, amestecat\u0103
\ncu rom\u00e2n\u0103. L-a convins greu \u015fi acesta, urzicat,
\na plecat dezam\u0103git, nu \u00eenainte de-a face semn
\nLigiei s\u0103-l urmeze \u015fi de a-l gratula pe Nae c-o
\ndedica\u0163ie: \u201eVa fan cullo!\u201d. L-am \u00eentrebat pe
\nNae ce-nseamn\u0103, dar a refuzat s\u0103-mi
\nr\u0103spund\u0103, de unde am dedus c\u0103 era o
\n\u00eenjur\u0103tur\u0103 imposibil de rostit p\u00e2n\u0103 \u015fi de el. A
\n\u015fuierat doar printre din\u0163i: \u201eNi\u015fte obseda\u0163i!\u201d.
\nVis-a-vis de fabric\u0103, se afla spa\u0163iul de
\ncazare a lucr\u0103torilor veni\u0163i de departe \u2013 un fel
\nde hangar \u00eentunecos, cu camere prin care
\ntreceai ca \u00eentr-un tren, dintr-un vagon \u00een altul.
\nNe oprim \u2013 Nae \u015fi cu mine \u2013 \u00eentr-una dintre
\nele, unde trei b\u0103rba\u0163i \u015fi o femeie jucau c\u0103r\u0163i.
\n\u00cemi r\u0103sare \u00een minte \u00eentrebarea dac\u0103 a\u015fa s-o fi
\nmuncind \u00een Italia. Aflu c\u0103 urma ca ei s\u0103 intre
\n\u00een schimbul de noapte. \u00cen camer\u0103 domnea o
\ndezordine des\u0103v\u00e2r\u015fit\u0103 \u2013 haine aruncate peste
\ntot, ce\u015fti cu za\u0163 de cafea, ibrice, chibrituri,
\n\u0163ig\u0103ri, m\u00e2ncare, c\u0103r\u0163i de joc, ciorapi
\ndesperechea\u0163i, tot ce voiai. Femeia \u00eemi face
\nloc pe un scaun; mi-e team\u0103 s\u0103-l ating. P\u00e2n\u0103 la
\nurm\u0103, m\u0103 a\u015fez, regret\u00e2nd c\u0103 n-am \u00eenv\u0103\u0163at arta
\na\u015fezatului pe scaun la un milimetru distan\u0163\u0103
\nde acesta. Stau str\u00e2mb, \u00eentr-o r\u00e2n\u0103,
\nincomodat\u0103 de atmosfera din jur, ner\u0103bd\u0103toare
\ns\u0103 plec. Unul strig\u0103:
\n-Lola, f\u0103 \u015fi tu o cafea!
\n– Macao!, se treze\u015fte un altul.
\nAl treilea se adreseaz\u0103 lui Nae:
\n– Hai, scoate ce-ai adus!
\n– Mai \u00eent\u00e2i banii!, \u00ee\u015fi ap\u0103r\u0103 Nae interesele.
\n– Ce faci, m\u0103, ceri banii \u00eenainte, ca la curve?
\n– Curve \u2013 necurve, nu desfac nimic p\u00e2n\u0103 nu
\nv\u0103d banii.
\n– C\u00e2t ai adus?
\n– Cincizeci de cartu\u015fe. \u015etii c\u00e2t face asta.
\nOmul scoate un teanc de sub saltea, num\u0103r\u0103,
\nmai cere unuia c\u00e2\u0163iva euro, apoi \u00eei \u00eentinde lui
\nNae.
\n– Na!
\nAcesta num\u0103r\u0103 atent \u015fi-i pune \u00eentr-un buzunar
\npe interior, apoi i se adreseaz\u0103:
\n– S\u0103 vin\u0103 unu` s\u0103 m-ajute! Ia \u015fi ranga!
\nIes \u015fi eu, c\u0103 \u015fi-a\u015fa m\u0103 sufocam. Rom\u00e2nul
\nitalienizat m\u0103 prive\u015fte str\u00e2mb, Nae \u00eei face
\nsemn discret, ceva gen: \u201eLas-o, c\u0103-i
\ninofensiv\u0103!\u201d. \u00cei v\u0103d desf\u0103c\u00e2nd podeaua
\nma\u015finii, cu mi\u015fc\u0103ri experte, se observa c\u0103 nu
\nerau la prima \u201etentativ\u0103\u201d. Nae scoate, iar
\ncel\u0103lalt num\u0103r\u0103 cartu\u015fe albe \u015fi ro\u015fii de
\n\u201eMarlboro\u201d.
\n– Pe-aici sunt foarte scumpe, \u00eemi explic\u0103.
\n– C\u00e2t de scumpe?
\n– Triplu fa\u0163\u0103 de c\u00e2t sunt la noi.
\nCalculez mental, amintindu-mi c\u00e2\u0163i bani a
\nprimit Nae pentru cele cincizeci de cartu\u015fe \u015fi
\naflu c\u0103 el le vindea numai dublu. Asta da
\nafacere!
\nM\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc la mine, cum mi-am ascuns \u00een
\npo\u015fet\u0103 trei pachete de \u0163ig\u0103ri cump\u0103rate din
\n\u0163ar\u0103, s\u0103 am \u00een primele zile, \u015fi-am tremurat \u015fi
\npentru alea la controlul vamal. \u015etiam c\u0103 nu e
\nvoie s\u0103 le trecem grani\u0163a. Nae, \u00een schimb, n-a
\navut niciun stres. Presupun c\u0103 face asta la
\nfiecare curs\u0103. Eh, banul se c\u00e2\u015ftig\u0103 muncind!
\nDup\u0103 zdrobeala cu \u0163ig\u0103rile, ne
\n\u00eentoarcem s\u0103 ne termin\u0103m cafeaua. Dau s\u0103-l
\n\u00eenduplec pe Nae: \u201eNu plec\u0103m?\u201d \u00cemi taie
\nelanul, anun\u0163\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 c\u0103 trebuie s-o a\u015ftept\u0103m
\npe Ligia. M\u0103 \u00eenfior la g\u00e2ndul c\u0103 am putea s\u0103
\nmai facem vreo dou\u0103 opriri, necesare Ligiei
\ns\u0103-i poat\u0103 pl\u0103ti lui Nae cursa. \u00cemi vine s\u0103 scot
\no sut\u0103 cincizeci de euro, s\u0103 i-o pl\u0103tesc eu,
\ndac\u0103 a\u015f \u015fti c\u0103 se mul\u0163ume\u015fte cu asta. M\u0103 tem
\n\u00eens\u0103 c\u0103 nu ar ajuta la nimic; calic cum e, ar lua
\n\u015fi banii, ar \u015fi folosi-o. Re\u00eentoars\u0103 \u00een camer\u0103, o
\nsimt pe Lola studiindu-m\u0103 f\u0103r\u0103 jen\u0103. Apoi, cu
\njum\u0103tate de gur\u0103, parc\u0103 nevenindu-i s\u0103 cread\u0103,
\nm\u0103 interogheaz\u0103:
\n– \u015ei tu ai venit la munc\u0103?
\n– Nu, r\u0103spund timid.
\nNae completeaz\u0103: \u201eDoamna e la plimbare\u201d.
\n– A! Ce fel de plimbare?
\nAm… venit s\u0103 v\u0103d pe cineva.
\n– Tu n-ai nevoie de bani?, \u00eemi arunc\u0103 de sus.
\nSau \u0163i-i d\u0103 \u201ecineva\u201d?
\n– Ba da, am nevoie, dar mi-i c\u00e2\u015ftig \u00een \u0163ar\u0103.
\n– Aha! \u015ei ce faci ca s\u0103-i c\u00e2\u015ftigi?
\n– Sunt translator \u015fi profesor de limbi str\u0103ine.
\nF\u0103c\u00e2nd o fa\u0163\u0103 lung\u0103, se uit\u0103 la Nae pentru
\nconfirmare; acesta d\u0103 scurt din cap, f\u0103r\u0103
\nvorbe.
\n– O! P\u0103i atunci, dac\u0103 e\u015fti profesoar\u0103 de
\nlimbi, nu m\u0103 \u00eendoiesc c\u0103 ai un c\u00e2\u015ftig bun
\nacolo \u00een \u0163ar\u0103. Cu asta se c\u00e2\u015ftig\u0103 bine peste tot,
\n\u00eemi arunc\u0103 r\u0103ut\u0103cioas\u0103.
\nM\u0103 prefac a nu fi priceput ironia (ce spun
\n\u201eironie\u201d?, grosol\u0103nia) \u015fi z\u00e2mbesc, tr\u00e2ntind pe
\nmas\u0103 cea\u015fca de cafea aproape neatins\u0103:
\n– Mul\u0163umesc!
\n– Nu \u0163i-a pl\u0103cut?
\nNu-i mai r\u0103spund. M\u0103 rog \u00een g\u00e2nd s\u0103 am
\nputerea de a nu judeca, at\u00e2ta timp c\u00e2t nu \u015ftiu
\nce e \u00een sufletul ei, ce via\u0163\u0103 duce, \u00een parte lesne
\nde observat. Spal\u0103, calc\u0103, face m\u00e2ncare la trei
\nb\u0103rba\u0163i \u2013 un amant, un frate \u015fi un v\u0103r, noaptea
\nse duce la munc\u0103; \u015fi-o fi l\u0103sat \u015fi vreun copil
\nprin \u0163ar\u0103… Singurele distrac\u0163ii \u2013 b\u0103utul
\ncafelei, fumatul \u015fi jocul de macao. \u00cei studiez
\nm\u00e2inile: muncite, grosolane, noduroase (Nae
\nzicea c\u0103 se lucreaz\u0103 greu nenorocita aia de
\npiele, d-aia rom\u00e2nii sunt c\u0103uta\u0163i \u2013 c\u0103 sunt \u015fi
\npricepu\u0163i \u015fi harnici. \u015ei nu fac nazuri, lucreaz\u0103
\npe doi lei, pe care de multe ori \u00eei v\u0103d la
\nsf\u00e2ntu-a\u015fteapt\u0103). Pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 m\u00e2inile Lolei, ale
\nmele \u2013 altfel normale \u2013 par ni\u015fte m\u00e2ini de
\np\u0103pu\u015fic\u0103 dintr-o vitrin\u0103 de lux. \u00cei \u00een\u0163eleg furia.
\nCe nu \u00een\u0163eleg e de ce, dup\u0103 ce c\u0103 are m\u00e2ini
\nat\u00e2t de ur\u00e2te, \u015fi-a mai pus \u015fi c\u00e2te dou\u0103 inele de
\nprost gust pe fiecare deget. \u015ei dou\u0103 lan\u0163uri
\ngroase la g\u00e2t. Chit c\u0103 e \u00eembr\u0103cat\u0103 ca o
\nbuc\u0103t\u0103reas\u0103.
\nDec\u00e2t s\u0103-i st\u00e2rnesc \u00een continuare furia,
\nmai bine plec. \u00cei spun lui Nae din mers: \u201eTe
\na\u015ftept la ma\u015fin\u0103\u201d, dau \u201ebun\u0103 seara\u201d f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103-i
\nprivesc \u015fi ies. Lola alearg\u0103 dup\u0103 mine \u015fi m\u0103
\nstrig\u0103: \u201eDoamna profesoar\u0103! Doamna
\nprofesoar\u0103!\u201d. Nu-i r\u0103spund, convins\u0103 c\u0103 \u00ee\u015fi
\nbate joc. M\u0103 ajunge din urm\u0103, \u00eemi \u00eenha\u0163\u0103
\num\u0103rul cu lopata ei dreapt\u0103 \u015fi m\u0103 \u00eentoarce
\nspre ea. Constat cu uimire c\u0103 are lacrimi \u00een
\nochi.
\n– Doamna profesoar\u0103, ierta\u0163i-m\u0103! N-am vrut
\ns\u0103 v\u0103 jignesc; sau, m\u0103 rog, am vrut, dar \u00eemi
\npare r\u0103u. O ducem greu pe-aici, c\u00e2\u015ftig\u0103m
\nceva, dar numai noi \u015ftim c\u00e2te \u00eendur\u0103m. Nu ne
\nplace s\u0103 vedem femei elegante, curate \u015fi care\u015fi
\npot c\u00e2\u015ftiga traiul f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 se umileasc\u0103. V\u0103
\ninvidiez! Dar a\u0163i fost bun\u0103 \u015fi nu mi-a\u0163i
\nr\u0103spuns la m\u0103g\u0103rii. E u\u015for s\u0103 fii bun c\u00e2nd e\u015fti
\nfericit…
\nHm… iat\u0103 c\u00e2t de relativ\u0103 e no\u0163iunea de
\nfericire. Pentru biata Lola, fericirea \u00eenseamn\u0103
\ns\u0103 fii elegant\u0103, curat\u0103 \u015fi s\u0103-\u0163i po\u0163i c\u00e2\u015ftiga traiul
\nf\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 te umile\u015fti. Un student \u00eemi spusese
\nodat\u0103 c\u0103 pentru el fericirea \u00eenseamn\u0103 s\u0103-\u015fi
\npoat\u0103 cump\u0103ra o pereche de blugi.
\n\u00cei \u00eentorc spatele Lolei, intru \u00een ma\u015fin\u0103
\n\u015fi \u00eei tr\u00e2ntesc portiera \u00een nas. O deschide,
\nhot\u0103r\u00e2t\u0103 s\u0103 nu-mi dea pace. \u00ce\u015fi scoate cel mai
\ngros inel de pe deget \u015fi mi-l pune \u00een palm\u0103.
\nS\u0103-mi repar gre\u015feala!
\nFac un semn de neacceptare din cap,
\ndar insist\u0103, \u00eemi str\u00e2nge pumnul peste inel. Ce
\ns-o \u00eenve\u0163i c\u0103 gre\u015felile nu se repar\u0103 cu aur?
\nPleac\u0103 fericit\u0103, zic\u00e2ndu-\u015fi probabil c\u0103 eu ar
\ntrebui s-o invidiez acum, de vreme ce ea \u015fi-a
\npermis s\u0103 ofere. Foarte bine. M\u0103car de-ar
\najuta-o!
\n\u00cei \u00eentind inelul Ligiei, care tocmai se
\nurcase \u00een spate, smotocit\u0103 toat\u0103 \u015fi cu un
\nz\u00e2mbet t\u00e2mp pe figur\u0103. \u0162inea \u00een m\u00e2n\u0103
\ncincizeci de euro, pe care a avut grij\u0103 s\u0103-i
\ndepun\u0103 pe bord. Prive\u015fte uimit\u0103 inelul \u015fi m\u0103
\n\u00eentreab\u0103 de ce.
\n– De-aia! C\u0103 nu-mi trebuie.
\n– Mersi!
\n– Dac\u0103 nu-\u0163i place, po\u0163i s\u0103-l arunci.
\n-Aaaa, nu, o s\u0103-l v\u00e2nd, s\u0103 mai scot un ban.
\nS\u0103 nu-i spune\u0163i lui Nae c\u0103 mi l-a\u0163i dat!
\nNu-i spun, toanto! De ce crezi c\u0103 \u0163i l-am dat
\n\u00een lipsa lui?
\n– Ascunde-l! Vezi c\u0103 vine!
\nOcup\u00e2ndu-\u015fi locul, Nae prive\u015fte cei cincizeci
\nde euro \u015fi se \u00eentoarce spre Ligia:
\n– At\u00e2t ai fost \u00een stare?
\n– Hai, m\u0103i Nae, \u015ftii \u015fi tu c\u00e2t sunt \u0103\u015ftia de
\nzg\u00e2rci\u0163i. Las\u0103 c\u0103 mai fac rost, ce at\u00e2ta grab\u0103?
\n– La drum!, mai zice Nae, l\u0103s\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 cu
\n\u00eentrebarea: \u201eDoamne, la care drum? C\u00e2te-mi
\nva fi dat s\u0103 mai v\u0103d p\u00e2n\u0103 la destina\u0163ie?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Oana GOIA<\/strong><\/p>\n

O cuminec\u0103tur\u0103 pentru \u00eengeri
\ns\u0103-mi aprind\u0103 lini\u0219tea \u00een gur\u0103<\/strong><\/p>\n

De c\u00e2nd m\u0103 \u0219tiu am visat. Altfel. \u00cen
\ncuvinte \u00eembr\u0103cate-n negru ce se i\u021besc
\nca pe-o diminea\u021b\u0103 de cea\u021b\u0103 alb
\norbitoare. M\u0103 \u00eenfuriau aceia ce-mi spuneau c\u0103
\ndoar oamenii de\u0219tep\u021bi viseaz\u0103-n culori. Mi-o
\nspuneau cu rictus semiotic \u2013 eu nu-s.
\nEu visez cuvinte, f\u0103r\u0103 nicio imagine.
\nToate scenele mele sunt o carte f\u0103r\u0103 poze.
\nPerfect tehno-redactat\u0103. Visele mele dureaz\u0103
\nenorm, \u00ees ni\u0219te valize c\u00e2t un marfar. \u0218i ce
\nvisez, citesc \u00eencet \u0219i rar. Ca ruminan\u0163ia. Mi-e
\nru\u0219ine pu\u021bin de compara\u021bia \u0219chioap\u0103, alta n-am
\n\u00een palm\u0103. Seam\u0103n cu un animal rumeg\u0103tor-mestec\u0103tor.
\nEu \u00eemi \u00eenghit visele citite, a\u0219a
\ncum m\u0103n\u00e2nc\u0103 o c\u0103mil\u0103, \u00eens\u0103 ei \u00eei lipse\u0219te al
\ntreilea stomac, mie, nu. Prima dat\u0103 \u00eenghit
\ngrosier, duc textul \u00een depozitul unde \u00eel \u00eenmoi.
\nApoi, \u00eel duc \u00een fagure, unde-l fac de
\ndimensiuni convenabile diger\u0103rii. Dup\u0103
\nfagure, \u00eel trec \u00eenapoi \u00een lenea gurii, unde-l
\nregurgitez pe litere, \u0219i pe silabe, \u0219i pe \u00eentreg
\ncuv\u00e2ntul, \u0219i \u00een spa\u021biile lui, \u0219i aleluia, \u00eel \u00eenghit a
\ndoua oar\u0103 s\u0103 se duc\u0103 de-a gata \u00een stomacul
\nmare unde \u00eencepe. Nici nu \u0219tiu ce \u00eencepe. Din
\ninterior, \u00eemi porne\u0219te prin stratul subcutanat
\nadipos, \u00een derm \u0219i epiderm p\u00e2n\u0103 se str\u00e2ng
\nporii \u00eentr-un bulb fior. Ca atunci c\u00e2nd am
\nemo\u021bii v\u0103ratice, transpir dup\u0103 ureche \u0219i-n
\n\u0219an\u021bul buzei superioare, acolo unde mi se
\n\u00eembulzesc cuvintele \u00eengere\u0219ti. C\u0103 zg\u00e2i\u021bii
\nastrali mi-i car \u00een spinare. \u0218i-s o herghelie.
\nDe asta, atunci c\u00e2nd transpir, de fapt,
\nun \u00eenger respir\u0103 ca oamenii \u0219i respirarea suflu
\n\u00eemi d\u0103 fuga pe \u0219ira spin\u0103rii \u00een sus, p\u00e2n\u0103 la
\nureche unde-mi pune cuvinte, apoi se pune \u00een
\n\u0219an\u021bul buzei \u0219i-mi alunec\u0103-n gur\u0103. Nu-s
\ninsomniac\u0103, doar c\u0103 stau prea mult cu lumina
\naprins\u0103 \u00een toat\u0103 f\u0103ptura. E un efort mai mare
\npentru mine ca pentru \u0103ia de\u0219tep\u021bi ce viseaz\u0103
\nde-a gata \u2013 culori, oameni, locuri. Muncesc \u00een
\ncea\u021ba orbitoare cu \u00eengerii \u00een spate \u0219i cu un
\ncorp de suflare, s\u0103 citesc visul \u00een care e locul
\nvalizei mele.
\nNu \u0219tiu c\u00e2\u021bi au tr\u0103it cea\u021ba. Eu am tr\u0103it-o
\npe lumea adev\u0103rat\u0103, nu pe lumea cealalt\u0103 \u00een
\ncare visez ca \u0219i cu capu-n carte. C\u00e2nd stai \u00een
\ncea\u021ba alb\u0103 \u0219i dens\u0103, e\u0219ti ca \u0219i cum te-ai juca
\nBaba Oarb\u0103. Ca \u0219i cum un r\u0103u voitor te pune
\ns\u0103 stai \u00een bezna din lumina stins\u0103. Diferen\u021ba e
\nc\u0103 \u00een Baba Oarb\u0103 stai \u00een negru, iar \u00een cea\u021b\u0103
\nstai \u00een v\u0103g\u0103una unui alb ce te str\u00e2nge. Vai, c\u00e2t
\nm\u0103 \u00eengrozea jocul \u0103sta. Ar trebui interzis
\ncopiilor.
\nDe\u0219i nu visez ca tot omul, am fost un
\ncopil aproape ca un copil. Nici eu nu \u0219tiam s\u0103
\nadorm cu lumina stins\u0103. C\u00e2nd e\u0219ti mic, e\u0219ti
\nat\u00e2t de gol de tine \u0219i at\u00e2t de plin de uitare,
\n\u00eenc\u00e2t ai nevoie de becul incandescent de care
\ns\u0103 te legeni. Copilul se leag\u0103n\u0103 singur pentru
\nc\u0103 e singur \u00een uitare. C\u00e2nd suntem prea mici
\nsuferim de na\u0219tere \u2013 forma concret\u0103 a
\nautismului. Actul venirii pe lume te rupe de
\nrealitatea astral\u0103, acolo unde sinele \u0219i-ai
\ndepozitat valizele, \u0219i te face s\u0103 tr\u0103ie\u0219ti o via\u021b\u0103
\ninterioar\u0103 \u00eentr-un sicriu, pe care de\u0219tep\u021bii \u0103ia
\nce viseaz\u0103 \u00een culori, l-au numit p\u0103m\u00e2nt. De
\nasta m\u0103 leg\u0103nam c\u00e2nd eram mai mic\u0103 \u0219i mai
\nsingur\u0103, nu sufeream \u00eentunericul. \u00centunericul e
\ncea\u021ba alb\u0103 a memoriei \u00een care m\u0103 c\u0103utam.
\nAvem senza\u021bia c\u0103 m\u0103 \u0219tiu \u0219i chiar m\u0103 \u0219tiam
\ndintr-un cer, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 v\u0103d ce-s \u0219i m\u0103 c\u0103utam pe
\nmine \u0219i toate locurile unde m-am g\u0103sit. Pentru
\nca atunci c\u00e2nd aveam s\u0103 cresc \u00een pa\u0219i, s\u0103 m\u0103
\n\u00eendrept \u00eentr-acolo. Eu n-am crescut, cum nici
\nn-am visat omene\u0219te. Au crescut cuvintele \u00een
\nmine ca pa\u0219ii mei de \u00eenfricat\u0103 cu \u00eengerii \u00een
\nspinare. Mi-a fost mereu fric\u0103 de nimic, iar
\nnimicul e ca spaima Baba Oarb\u0103. C\u00e2nd aud de
\ncuv\u00e2ntul \u0103sta \u2013 nimic, \u00eemi vine s\u0103 m\u0103 leag\u0103n
\nca-n pruncie cu becul aprins.
\n– Fata asta n-are s\u00e2nge, indiferent ce
\nven\u0103 \u00eei \u00een\u021bep. Nu-i curge nimic!
\nA\u0219a cum nu visez ca de\u0219tep\u021bii, a\u0219a nu-s
\nconstruit\u0103 ca tot omul. Mie nu-mi curge s\u00e2nge
\ndin nicio ven\u0103 de pe partea st\u00e2ng\u0103. Le spun
\ntuturor laboran\u021bilor c\u0103 dac\u0103 vor s\u00e2nge s\u0103 mi-l
\nia din m\u00e2na dreapt\u0103. \u00cen st\u00e2nga, \u00eemi curge
\nfrica.
\nFrica e forma concret\u0103 cronic\u0103 de
\nautism. C\u00e2nd eram mic\u0103 sufeream de na\u0219tere,
\niar de c\u00e2nd mi-au crescut pa\u0219ii, suf\u0103r de frica
\nnimicului. De asta \u0219i cred c\u0103 visele mele
\ndureaz\u0103 de c\u00e2nd \u00eenchid ochii p\u00e2n\u0103 mi se
\ndesprind pleoapele, s\u0103 nu cumva s\u0103 m\u0103 lege
\ncineva r\u0103u voitor la ochi \u0219i s\u0103 umblu prin
\ncea\u021ba dens\u0103 \u0219i alb\u0103 orbitor dup\u0103 mine s\u0103-mi
\nsting lumina nimicului. Azi noapte, mi s-a
\n\u00eent\u00e2mplat. A \u00eenceput totul ca de obicei. Am
\ntras pleoapele \u0219i am l\u0103sat b\u0103rbia \u00een piept. \u00cen
\nbra\u021be \u021bineam o carte la care \u00eendoiam col\u021buri de
\npagini. De obicei, \u00eendoi acolo unde sunt \u0219i
\nadnot\u0103ri despre locuri. \u0218i citeam \u00eencet \u0219i rar,
\nc\u00e2nd m\u00e2inile mele au l\u0103sat grijulii cartea
\ndeoparte, m-am ridicat din vis \u0219i am dat fuga.
\nMi-am luat \u00een picioare pantofii rubinii ca ai
\nlui Dorothy. Pe um\u0103r, mi-am aruncat
\n\u0219treng\u0103re\u0219te o jachet\u0103 incandescent\u0103 \u0219i am
\nfugit la oglind\u0103. Nu eram surprins\u0103 de nimic,
\nde\u0219i pentru prima dat\u0103 visam imagini. \u0218i nu
\nmi-era nici fric\u0103. M-am uitat pentru prima
\ndat\u0103 \u00eentr-o oglind\u0103 de-adev\u0103ratelea. \u0218i toate
\nerau la locul lor. Dup\u0103 ureche \u0219i \u00een \u0219an\u021bul
\nbuzei superioare, \u00eemi transpirau respira\u021bii
\nvenite de pe \u0219ira spin\u0103rii, iar pe fa\u021b\u0103, aveam
\npistrui ca \u00een desene animate.
\nP\u0103ream mai frumoas\u0103. Nu-mi era fric\u0103.
\nM-am \u00eendreptat spre u\u0219\u0103, am pus m\u00e2na pe
\nclan\u021b\u0103 \u0219i nimicul nu se deschidea.
\n\u00cemi curgea doar s\u00e2nge. Nu-mi era fric\u0103.
\nMi-am luat toate c\u0103r\u021bile citite rar \u0219i \u00eencet s\u0103
\nv\u0103d dac\u0103 scrie undeva cum se deschide o u\u0219\u0103.
\n\u00centr-o \u00eendoitur\u0103 de pagin\u0103, scria la not\u0103 de
\nsubsol: o u\u0219\u0103 \u00eenchis\u0103 se deschide cu
\npunctatorul. Mi-am luat valiza \u0219i m-am \u00eentors
\ncu ea \u00een fa\u021ba oglinzii.
\nNu-mi era fric\u0103, de\u0219i \u00eemi curgea s\u00e2nge.
\nDin sclerotica ochiului alb orbitoare de cea\u021b\u0103,
\nmi-am scos punctatorul \u0219i, de la dreapta la
\nst\u00e2nga ca \u00een braille, am \u00eenceput s\u0103-mi scriu
\npupila st\u00e2ng\u0103, de acolo de unde mi se \u00eenfiripa
\nfrica. Apoi mi-am scris st\u00e2nga toat\u0103, de acolo
\nde unde nu-mi curge s\u00e2nge.
\nDoar frica.
\nLa final, mi-am \u00eentors pupila pe dos ca \u00een
\nbraille \u0219i am pip\u0103it-o p\u00e2n\u0103 la inim\u0103. Pistruii
\nmi s-au aprins ca felinarele \u0219i \u00een foveea inimii
\nmele se f\u0103cu lumin\u0103. \u00cengerii tr\u0103geau de cea\u021ba
\nalb orbitoare ca de draperii. R\u00e2deau homeric.
\nNu le era fric\u0103.
\nM-am trezit duc\u00e2nd ca \u00eentr-un marfar, o
\ncuminec\u0103tur\u0103 pentru respir\u0103rile \u00eengerilor ce-mi
\nalunec\u0103 prin \u0219an\u021bul buzei superioare fix \u00een
\ngur\u0103 ca s\u0103-mi aprind\u0103 lini\u0219tea.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Florentina Loredana DALIAN Scrisori netrimise (2) Aveam s\u0103 aflu cur\u00e2nd c\u0103 Nae nu terminase surprizele. \u00cen drum spre Tortona, ne-am<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17,"featured_media":10522,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"colormag_page_container_layout":"default_layout","colormag_page_sidebar_layout":"default_layout","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"video_url":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[7,329],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10635"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/17"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10635"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10635\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10636,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10635\/revisions\/10636"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/10522"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10635"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10635"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ziarulderimnic.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10635"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}